Homeschooling Hope
I know the internet is packed full beyond capacity of blogs of every sort….. but I have decided to add another category to “i don’t just see with my eyes” blog - – HOMESCHOOLING HOPE. As you can see from my last post…. I haven’t been blogging. I have been homeschooling my 13-year-old son Cameron. Yes. I know – - I can hear the “whats and whys” as your eyes bug a bit. WHY when there are perfectly great schools with a stellar honors program. WHAT made you think you should or could do it. WHY does your 13-year-old even want his mom to be his teacher? WHAT can be so bad that would make you stop your daily routine and personal projects to try to teach a hormonal moody confused boy? WHY is your son so unhappy? I don’t have answers to all of these questions. I don’t even think Cameron’s story is mine to share, in detail, on a blog. But I will share this, one day when I was at the point of tears and prayers and fear that my son wasn’t even resembling himself that a friend shared information about an online private school in Pleasant Grove, UT and the Spirit directed me that this was the next step we needed to take. After prayer, counseling with my husband and a visit to the temple – we presented Liahona Prep Academy distance education online program to Cameron. He was willing and ready.
We set up a desk, a computer and took a few weeks to heal. We visited campus and got to know the program. We went rock climbing. Cameron read a lot (finishing the Work and the Glory series). Then, over 12 weeks ago, we started to try to establish a routine and school began. Some days have been some of the most heart wrenching spirit stretching moments of my life. Then there have with increasing frequency, as of late, times during the day when I have connected with my brilliant and strong son and seen a part of who he really is. I am being taught things about myself I never intended or thought would come from this experience. I can be controlling and a perfectionist. I fear being wrong. So I have prayed to be filled with understand and charity. I have prayed to know how to teach my son even though I have a teaching degree – - so different with your own child. I have been grateful for friends that have taken my tearful phone calls and encouraged me when I thought I couldn’t do one more day. 
This blog is not going to rank up there with #1 site for great lesson plans or tips on how to get your son to like poetry. I hope this is a place where I can share honest limitations, ideas and lessons I am learning through the great gift of homeschooling. The first lesson I have learned is – - don’t judge other parents because you never know when you will be in their place making those same decisions. I never visualized I would be homeschooling Cameron. I know he probably never dreamed it as well. Together we bump into each other a lot and we have had some hard times trusting each other – but we are getting better everyday. Nephi built a ship when he didn’t know how. I trust that if I continue to go to my Father in Heaven, he will tell me first where to find the ore – to make the tools – to then start the ship. Mothers are here to do the work of God so I pray that His spirit will work through me. My prayer is that this time is a game changer for Cameron and a course correction for my emotional and spiritual progression. Just like climbing a wall, I slip and sometimes I find just the right spot for my foot and eventually I make progression to the top. Cameron said it perfectly when he yelled up the wall at me, “Trust me mom you are going to be fine!” Maybe he is right!
QUESTION: What is something you are doing right now that you never thought you would?
FAITH
“Faith will not give you what you want it will help you know or understand what is divinely intended for you.”
The Lord is in Control
“My message to you today, my brothers and sisters, is simply this: the Lord is in control. He knows the end from the beginning. He has given us adequate instruction that, if followed, will see us safely through any crisis. His purposes will be fulfilled, and someday we will understand the eternal reasons for all of these events. Therefore, today we must be careful to not overreact, nor should we be caught up in extreme preparations; but what we must do is keep the commandments of God and never lose hope!”
M. Russell Ballard, “The Joy of Hope Fulfilled,” Ensign, Nov. 1992
Scriptures to comfort fears
I have heard thy prayers,
I have seen thy tears,
Behold, I will heal thee.
Brooklyn’s Miracle Eyes
So today is the anniversary of Brooklyn’s seizure. It was 1 year ago tonight that Brooklyn had a seizure resulting in her father administering CPR to bring her back to consciousness. There is nothing more horrifying as to see your child lifeless, turning blue and not breathing. After many tests and doctor appointments, we learned some new information and also had questions go unanswered. Brooklyn had an amazing year of health and kindergarten fun. She danced in competitions and started violin lessons. She swims and swings and rides a two-wheeler. She reads and talks like a 30-year-old and brings joy to our family. This week Brooklyn and I went to her yearly eye appointment for her “magic eyes” (bilateral colobomas). We have been going to PCMC and the Moran Eye Center since Brooklyn was 6 weeks old. Brooklyn’s prognosis has been some issues with light sensitivity, focus limitations and some mild sight issues. We have always thought that there would be a day she would maybe need glasses. No worries since her brother and dad already sport cool lenses. Glasses are a small price to pay when we originally were told Brooklyn would be blind. So weren’t we surprised this week to find out that not only has she had a great year with no more seizures but her eyesight tests at 20/20 in both eyes. She has perfect vision. Her eyes are now stronger. She has grown in so many ways. She is reading the Book of Mormon with me every night and wants to understand all the stories and terms. She is loving summer but ready for 1st grade when she can stay all day at school and have lunch and 3 recesses. I am always amazed at what my children teach me. This week, Brooklyn shown me again that there is a God of miracles. She is proof of that!
Thank you to all who have prayed and considered our family over the past year. Thank you to all that have asked for updates about Brooklyn and her health.
The Seasons of our Life
Recently Brooklyn and I visited two of my nieces because they both had baby boys. That makes me an official “Great Aunt G” right? As I watched my daughter – holding one of these sweet babies I was overcome with the thought how fast the life passes by. I think every mother with a 12-year-old entering Jr. High and a daughter going to 1st grade next year thinks about how much time she spent on what matters most. I am. I have some great memories and some regrets. I think that as summer approaches and turns into fall I want to remember the summer of 2010 as the time in which my relationships grew stronger, my faith expanded and my heart stayed soft and open. Many mothers look at this time of change with mixed emotions. It is exciting to have kids home and free from daily homework duties yet kids home can bring a whole new state of being. My prayer is that God will use me to bring joy into my children’s lives. I don’t want to wish away any season. That is my advice for the two new mommies – the sleepless nights and feedings pass all so quickly. So on the darker days remember to breathe and pray, you will make it. And it is worth it!
click here to watch a great video Seasons of our Life
Yes – I am Irish
My maiden middle name is KILLOUGH – yup this means I am Irish by blood (thanks Dad). I also had a wonderful Irish grandmother who would consciously make St. Patrick’s Day extra special.
So this morning I woke up determined to share a few Irish treats to celebrate with my family. I thought I would share them with you…
Green Food:
green milk, green waffles, green eggs, green yogurt, green alfredo sauce for your spaghetti dinner and all the green veggies you can pile on their plate
Green clothes, green dishes and a little Irish music. If you have cable music stations the Sounds of the Season have a great selection of music non stop without commercial interruptions. At dinner tonight – share with each other why you feel so LUCKY today! I feel blessed to have an amazing family.
My children jumped out of the car this morning wearing their green and Cameron turned back around to smile one more time and tell me he loved me. That was it! I had just been crowned “Luckiest Mom in the Neighborhood”. Luck of the Irish always shows up as God’s blessings! 
